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"Set Like The Sun." A short poem.
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Captian_Janeway
Lieutenant Commander


Joined: 27 Jul 2002
Posts: 283
Location: Terra

PostWed Nov 05, 2003 8:13 pm    "Set Like The Sun." A short poem.

"I regret to inform you..." the doctor said.
As he glanced at the people around my bed.
"...she died during childbirth, but the babe still lives."
She'll never know of the love a mother gives.
I was overcome with madness,
I made a promise for my girl out of sadness.
My daughter would find joy gracefully as a dove.
the three great joys; marriage, childbirth, and her one true love.
From a star in the vast sky,
I watched her as the years went by.
Through the many obstacles in her life,
she never let them cut her like a knife.
From my star I watched her find her one true love,
all she needed from me was one gentle shove.
The two of them married and lived happily ever after,
but they waited for the air to fill with a baby's laughter.
One year went by then another, and many years more,
and finally came the day when a baby she bore.
My purpose was filled and the job was done,
I was ready and I set like the sun.

What do you think of my poem??


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janewaykat
Vice Admiral


Joined: 14 May 2002
Posts: 5780
Location: Basketball court and college

PostWed Nov 05, 2003 8:15 pm    

that's very good.

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1/1
Rear Admiral


Joined: 12 Apr 2002
Posts: 3311
Location: La La Land

PostThu Nov 06, 2003 3:54 pm    

Thats so sad! At least it had a happy ending or did he kill himself when the sunset?

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Divinity
Captain


Joined: 07 May 2003
Posts: 948
Location: Western Australia

PostSat Nov 08, 2003 3:52 am    

i really like that! you should write more


-------signature-------

"When you're out there and immersed in the magic, and the lights are shining , and the cameras are rolling, and your bank account is growing, you think it will never end...but it does." Kate Mulgrew as Katharine Hepburn - Tea At Five

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Voy_Girl
Admiral


Joined: 07 Jan 2002
Posts: 8302
Location: Fair Haven

PostSat Nov 08, 2003 3:56 pm    

That was a really good poem!

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Josi Rockholt
Fleet Admiral


Joined: 29 Dec 2001
Posts: 10136
Location: Boston, Ma

PostSat Nov 08, 2003 5:38 pm    

It was very good.

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