Discipline and smacking kids?

[Leo Wyatt]

I talk with my kids. I just immediatly spank them. but they understand why they are getting it. But I use it as a last resort. but I believe in it.

[LightningBoy]

The world is not this ideal utopia that so many are envisioning. Face it, sometimes a smack is just a smack! Not everything leads to deep emotional scaring, and not everything causes kids to be damaged as they grow up. A little light corporal punishment can be good for a kid.

There's nothing wrong with a little swat to say "don't do that again!" It works, I know from experience. As a teenager and early adolescent, I never once got grounded. I learned to respect my parents and their rules at a very young age. They never gave me many rules, but when I did break one, I got a smack on the rear. I learned quickly.

[IntrepidIsMe]

I respect my parents more for not having smacked or spanked me, than if they had. But, whatever.

[Republican_Man]

My dad spanked me all the time when I misbehaved--same with my brother, although not so much my little sister. I remember an instance where he really unjustly spanked me. But I do NOT hate my parents for it, nor for washing my mouth out with soap. Do I dislike that they did it? Yes, but I think that sometimes corporal punishment--but NOT extreme punishment/abuse--is necessary and proper.
Although I would try talking with the child, first, being stern and explaining why what they did was wrong. Then, the next time they did it, I would speak to them again and then spank them. Then after that, do all of that and take something away. After that, I don't know. It wouldn't be pretty. If they cussed, I would was their mouth out with soap every time, without talking to them. They'll have known at that point that saying bad words is wrong, and so I would just immediately wash their mouths out with soap if they did it. I would probably stop doing that at 11 or 12, however, and start giving other punishments. If it's excessive from the start, the other punishments would start earlier. That's my 2 cents.

[magenta]

Its the problem kids who have recieved no disipline,that are violent towards their parents!

[IntrepidIsMe]

I agree, that is a problem. But they don't necessarily direct it towards their parents.

[magenta]

:-?When the parents tell them they cant go out or do something around the house,they use violence to get their own way!

[Seven of Nine]

Most of the bullies I know of were smacked at home. They were taught that violence is the answer if someone upsets you (since most children receive a smack when they've upset their parents in some way) and they carry it on throughout their life.

Another thing that interests me - hitting an adult is considered assault. Hitting a child that isn't your own is considered assault. Hitting your own child is discipline?

Smacking so it doesn't hurt (to shock a child into stopping what they're doing) can work, if it's reserved for those few occasions where what a child is doing/has just done is particulary dangerous or naughty. If it's used rarely, then the child will fear it more (does that ring true with any of you?). I'd rather use alternatives for raising Samantha, and time out is working particulary well, but when she's trying to put screwdrivers into power sockets, a quick smack on her well padded bottom is normally enough to get her to drop the screwdriver so I can pull her away.

[Leo Wyatt]

Bullies come from a family where there is no discipline and parents let them get by with it.. IntrepidisMe. I don't hit my kids. I spank and I don't abuse them. If I were abusin them I think Charlie would have stepped in.

[Thomas]

I think spanking/smacking a child who does something wrong is perfectly fine. My Mum always did it with my brothers and I when we were growing up... and it worked. None of us resent her for that. It made us all into the kind of kids who are always well-behaved at school, etc. But my eight year old sister is a real spoilt brat. Unlike when the rest of us were brought up, my Mum was working when she was young. Her Dad was looking after her a lot of the time when she was a toddler and she was pretty much allowed to do whatever she wanted at his house. It was the same with the kids that he has who are my age. They weren't disciplined properly when they were younger and they were always getting into fights at school and stuff like that. Of course, if they had been smacked, that would've just taught them that violence was okay, or something? Maybe not. Maybe it's different for every child, but my Mum tries talking to my sister all the time and making her understand what she's doing wrong. She treats everyone with no respect. Like she won't even get up off the sofa in the morning to go and get her breakfast, or, when she's done, to take her dishes through to the kitchen. She'll talk to Mum really sarcastically or whatever, not caring that she shouldn't be shouting for people to drop everything and serve her, be told not to do it again and why she shouldn't behave like that, and then do it all over again in a day or two. She actually stole money from the car one day, and when she was asked where she'd got the money from (at the same time this money from the car had mysteriously disappeared), she said I'd given it to her. So I got a call asking if that was true. Mum also found that someone had been in her purse, because the stuff she had on top of it in the drawer it was in had all been moved. You need to slap kids for that kind of thing or it's going to keep happening.

[PrankishSmart]

I used to get the wooden spoon & plastic spatula and had a couple broken on my rear end. I still think I turned out allright . That was only in most severe situations. I think those sort of days are over though and lighter spanking/smaking seems the go. Never the less, I truly believe if the parent is skilled enough, they can raise the child perfectly fine without inflicting any pain at all. Aaron's parents seem to have done a good job

Whats the deal with boys getting spanked/smaked more than girls, anyway. It's not like boys play up more ten fold.

[IntrepidIsMe]

Awwww, thanks Ben,

Hmmm, well you're always told its wrong to hit a girl. Although of course its wrong to hit another boy too, but less wrong? Just silly.

[madlilnerd]

I wouldn't spank any of my imaginary children. They're too cool for that.

When I have children, I will punish them in different ways, like making them do a gross chore, like cleaning out the gutters. But I would always tell them why they deserved a smack, even if I didn't give them one.

[Theresa]

Tsss, Aaron's been caught in is liiiiiies. We can prove that he thinks painful discipline teaches lessons, *cough*. Poor Connor,

[ACDC Girl]

I have nothing against the people who spank their kids for punishment, but it only depends on how you do it. Like, if it's a tap on the bum with the bare hand it's not so bad, but if it was with a paddle or something then ya it would be a very big deal cause that's not right.

[IntrepidIsMe]

[Kasey]

My grandparents and my aunt spank me . I was not abused at all. I don't find it abuse. I didn't turn out bad.