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Defiant
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 1:39 pm    AWESOME chemistry joke

The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of
Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question:
Is Hell exothermic, (gives off heat),--- or endothermic, (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas
cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the
volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter
Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell
breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,
then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen
over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it
follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven, ---- thereby proving the existence of a divine being, --------- which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"


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Five - seveN
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 1:45 pm    

ROFLMAO!!!! v

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Defiant
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 1:47 pm    

My thoughts exactly!

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Five - seveN
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 1:50 pm    

We had an English irregular verbs test once. Some guy didn't know the three forms of 'zinken' (~'to sink') so he filled in blub-blub-blub instead of sink-sank-sunk. The teacher didn't count that as wrong

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lionhead
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 2:03 pm    

Thats funny, difficult but funny.

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Alucard
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 4:01 pm    

that's hialrious!

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syd2002
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 4:06 pm    

LOL, omg funny stuff!

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Defiant
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 4:08 pm    

Isnt it though? Funny thing is, there is this girl who I work with in the marketplace named Teresa, and every time I see her, I think of the joke!!!

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superwoman
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 4:14 pm    

Hehe! That thing up there is funny.

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Defiant
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 4:15 pm    

Aye, thats why I posted it!!

Sing me a song, youre the piano man.


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lionhead
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 4:26 pm    

Man?

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superwoman
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 4:35 pm    

Defiant wrote:
Aye, thats why I posted it!!
I thought you posted it because it's educational...

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Defiant
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 5:02 pm    

Educational too.

Sing us a song, youre the piano man. Sing us a song tonight. We're in the mood for a melody, and youve got us feeling alright.


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sabertooth1217
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 5:20 pm    

Wow, What an Awesome answer!

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Defiant
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 5:21 pm    

I actually understand it too, its pretty awesome!!! (the endothemic/exothermic energy concept I mean)

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Starbuck
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 10:00 pm    

priceless.........

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Founder
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PostTue Nov 23, 2004 10:20 pm    

What a f*****g nerd. Thats saying something if someone on a ST messageboard is calling him that.....

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Defiant
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PostWed Nov 24, 2004 12:19 am    

No, its funny. Geez.

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Captain Dappet
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PostWed Nov 24, 2004 12:00 pm    

I like. I think I'll save it on my computer.

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Sarah Connor
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PostWed Nov 24, 2004 1:05 pm    

I have a feeling Dappet and Defiant are just giving each other more jokes....Anywayz, its funny

Last edited by Sarah Connor on Wed Nov 24, 2004 6:17 pm; edited 1 time in total



-------signature-------

Sarah Connor is not here right now, please leave a message at the warpcore explosion! *Warpcore Exposion*

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TrekkieMage
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PostWed Nov 24, 2004 6:16 pm    



That's great!!


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Link, the Hero of Time
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PostWed Nov 24, 2004 11:26 pm    

Now that answer was a work of pure Genius. It's just beautiful.

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memyselfandI
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PostFri Nov 26, 2004 12:54 am    

That...........was.................AWESOME!!!!

Man, I wish I had that kind of genious. *thinks of how many A's he could have gotten on papers with an answer like that.


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Natira
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PostWed Dec 01, 2004 10:42 am    

I know another Teresa... well Theresa, but it still is funny putting her in there....

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Five - seveN
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PostWed Dec 01, 2004 1:44 pm    

^

btw, I just recieved a 10 (A) for a physics test, without silly stories.


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