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Kerry Does'Top Ten' on Letterman Show
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Jeff Miller
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PostTue Sep 21, 2004 10:30 am    Kerry Does'Top Ten' on Letterman Show

Quote:

Sen. John Kerry, D-Mass.,laughs along with talk show host David Letterman while presenting the "Top Ten list" during a taping of CBS's "The Late Show with David Letterman", Monday Sept. 20, 2004 on the CBS Television Network. (AP Photo/John Paul Filo, CBS)

Sep 21, 10:01 AM EDT
Kerry Does'Top Ten' on Letterman Show
By NEDRA PICKLER
Associated Press Writer

NEW YORK (AP) -- Democrat John Kerry joked on "The Late Show with David Letterman" about changes under President Bush's tax plan, including that Vice President Dick Cheney can claim the president as a dependent.

Besides reading his "Top 10" list, Kerry also poked fun at the tedious debate negotiations between the rival campaigns that ended in agreement Monday. Kerry said he wanted running mate John Edwards to stand in the vice presidential debate, but Cheney wanted to sit. "We compromised and now George Bush is going to sit on Dick Cheney's lap," he said.

Both Bush and Democratic rival Al Gore appeared on "The Late Show" in 2000. Bush has not appeared on any late-night comedy shows in this campaign. Kerry also has appeared on Comedy Central's "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart" and "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno" on NBC.

Kerry's interview with Letterman wasn't all jokes. The Massachusetts senator spent much of his appearance discussing serious topics ranging from global warming to the beheading of an American hostage in Iraq. He talked about where he thinks the president has gone wrong in Iraq and what changes he would make as commander in chief.

Kerry appeared on the CBS show on the same day the network apologized for broadcasting a story questioning Bush's National Guard service. He joked about CBS' credibility when Letterman asked if poll numbers can be believed. "Depending on which network it is, we can," Kerry said with a chuckle.

Kerry's "Top 10 Bush Tax Proposals" are:

10. No estate tax for families with at least two U.S. presidents.

9. W-2 Form is now Dubya-2 Form.

8. Under the simplified tax code, your refund check goes directly to Halliburton.

7. The reduced earned income tax credit is so unfair, it just makes me want to tear out my lustrous, finely groomed hair.

6. Attorney General (John) Ashcroft gets to write off the entire U.S. Constitution.

5. Texas Rangers can take a business loss for trading Sammy Sosa.

4. Eliminate all income taxes; just ask Teresa (Heinz Kerry) to cover the whole damn thing.

3. Cheney can claim Bush as a dependent.

2. Hundred-dollar penalty if you pronounce it "nuclear" instead of "nucular."

1. George W. Bush gets a deduction for mortgaging our entire future.

During Kerry's trip to New York, he also delivered a speech laying out his vision for Iraq and raised $4 million at reception and dinner benefiting the Democratic National Committee.

He planned another television appearance Tuesday morning - on "Live with Regis and Kelly."


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Theresa
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PostTue Sep 21, 2004 10:44 am    

Any respect I may have had for Kerry? Gone.


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Founder
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PostTue Sep 21, 2004 12:57 pm    

This election is a joke to Kerry and a popularity contest to him.

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CJ Cregg
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PostTue Sep 21, 2004 2:06 pm    

My GOD!!! Someone told a JOKE!! Sound the alarms!!!

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Founder
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PostTue Sep 21, 2004 2:07 pm    

Uh im not basing my comment on what he did on Letterman. Im basing it off his whole campaign.

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Link, the Hero of Time
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PostTue Sep 21, 2004 4:19 pm    

Kerry goes on a popular TV show and jokes around and suddenly everyone's up in arms.

He's just following Clinton's Example. Connecting with the people and the youth.


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Kyre
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PostTue Sep 21, 2004 4:55 pm    

It seems like America is up the creek whoever gets elected.

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borgslayer
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PostTue Sep 21, 2004 5:02 pm    

People are taking things too seriously.

That top 10 stuff is typical letterman jokes and makes no difference. If Bush did the same thing people wouldnt feel the same way they would be "its ok because Bush is telling the joke, it wouldnt be ok if John Kerry says it because it is wrong, awful, and unjust"



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Republican_Man
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PostTue Sep 21, 2004 5:33 pm    

Theresa wrote:
Any respect I may have had for Kerry? Gone.

EXACTLY. Same here.

Quote:
Kerry's "Top 10 Bush Tax Proposals" are:

10. No estate tax for families with at least two U.S. presidents.

9. W-2 Form is now Dubya-2 Form.

8. Under the simplified tax code, your refund check goes directly to Halliburton.

7. The reduced earned income tax credit is so unfair, it just makes me want to tear out my lustrous, finely groomed hair.

6. Attorney General (John) Ashcroft gets to write off the entire U.S. Constitution.

5. Texas Rangers can take a business loss for trading Sammy Sosa.

4. Eliminate all income taxes; just ask Teresa (Heinz Kerry) to cover the whole damn thing.

3. Cheney can claim Bush as a dependent.

2. Hundred-dollar penalty if you pronounce it "nuclear" instead of "nucular."

1. George W. Bush gets a deduction for mortgaging our entire future.

During Kerry's trip to New York, he also delivered a speech laying out his vision for Iraq and raised $4 million at reception and dinner benefiting the Democratic National Committee.

He planned another television appearance Tuesday morning - on "Live with Regis and Kelly."


That's just BULL and a horrible attack! Wait--no, it's a "joke." Well, as Founder said, the election is just a big joke to Kerry.
And about the Regis and Kelly thing: My Great-grandmother watched that this morning and turned off the TV when he came on And she likes the show.

Founder wrote:
Uh im not basing my comment on what he did on Letterman. Im basing it off his whole campaign.


lol, yeah.

borgslayer wrote:
People are taking things too seriously.

That top 10 stuff is typical letterman jokes and makes no difference. If Bush did the same thing people wouldnt feel the same way they would be "its ok because Bush is telling the joke, it wouldnt be ok if John Kerry says it because it is wrong, awful, and unjust"


Sure, say that if you want, but what he's saying IS a horrible attack and does NOT include anything to be joked about.



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Theresa
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PostTue Sep 21, 2004 7:01 pm    

charmed88 wrote:
My GOD!!! Someone told a JOKE!! Sound the alarms!!!


If you've been paying attention to the ads, you'd have a clue.
I totally agree with Founder that Kerry is treating this election like a joke. It seems that to him it's more like getting elected president of a fraternity, rather than a country.



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CJ Cregg
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PostWed Sep 22, 2004 4:04 pm    

Theresa wrote:
charmed88 wrote:
My GOD!!! Someone told a JOKE!! Sound the alarms!!!


If you've been paying attention to the ads, you'd have a clue.
I totally agree with Founder that Kerry is treating this election like a joke. It seems that to him it's more like getting elected president of a fraternity, rather than a country.


whatever


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Theresa
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PostWed Sep 22, 2004 8:29 pm    

^Tsss, next time, inform yourself before posting. In case you've missed the rules, (they are posted in Suggestions, Feedback & Help, and also linked to the first topic on this page), replies such as that are not permitted,


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Ronevick
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PostWed Sep 22, 2004 8:37 pm    

Come on people, Kerry helped Clinton to pull the country out of a terrible economy when Clinton was president. We were gradually getting better with our money then Bush came in and blew the whole thing up in smoke. Now medical care costs are up, the economy is generally suffering, and we have the largest national deficit in modern history. Bush never stuck to his plan in Iraq, and now more than 1000 young American lives have been lossed. Bush fired all of the people actually doing their jobs correctly, and even his staff say he's been lying to the American public. What Kerry's doing is what Clinton's did, getting in touch with the American public and connecting with them on a level they understand. Just because he's running for president doesn't mean he can't crack a few jokes, and as far as i'm concerned, Bush deserves it.

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Republican_Man
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PostWed Sep 22, 2004 9:48 pm    

Ronevick wrote:
Come on people, Kerry helped Clinton to pull the country out of a terrible economy when Clinton was president.
I give him that, for the most part.

We were gradually getting better with our money then Bush came in and blew the whole thing up in smoke. Now medical care costs are up, the economy is generally suffering, and we have the largest national deficit in modern history.
1. Medical: What?
2. The economy is RECOVERING. And remember 9/11.
3. Yes, this deficit is bad.


Bush never stuck to his plan in Iraq, and now more than 1000 young American lives have been lossed.
Never stuck to his plan in Iraq? HOW SO? He's been STAUNCH there, unlike Kerry.

Bush fired all of the people actually doing their jobs correctly, and even his staff say he's been lying to the American public.
Huh? What people are they? No one said that Bush was lying, and if so, about what?

What Kerry's doing is what Clinton's did, getting in touch with the American public and connecting with them on a level they understand. Just because he's running for president doesn't mean he can't crack a few jokes, and as far as i'm concerned, Bush deserves it.


Oh, sure.



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Ronevick
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PostWed Sep 22, 2004 10:05 pm    

Chill man, i'm just saying my opinion. Also, you misunderstood what I said about Iraq. In the beginning of the war when we went into Iraq Bush claimed to have a plan as to be succesful in Iraq, but to my knowledge, most of that plan hasn't been followed. Again, in case you haven't heard, Bush's staff, people like Powell, all admit that Iraw should have and could have been handled much better, but Bush denies it. I do think Bush was right to go into Iraq, but he should have done it better(got support from the UN, didn't rush into war, etc...).

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Republican_Man
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PostWed Sep 22, 2004 10:11 pm    

Ronevick wrote:
Chill man, i'm just saying my opinion. Also, you misunderstood what I said about Iraq. In the beginning of the war when we went into Iraq Bush claimed to have a plan as to be succesful in Iraq, but to my knowledge, most of that plan hasn't been followed. Again, in case you haven't heard, Bush's staff, people like Powell, all admit that Iraw should have and could have been handled much better, but Bush denies it. I do think Bush was right to go into Iraq, but he should have done it better(got support from the UN, didn't rush into war, etc...).


Bush doesn't deny it--he HAS said that we should have done a few things differently. Rush into war! He did not do that! Get support from the UN--we TRIED to, but they denied.



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Ronevick
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PostThu Sep 23, 2004 2:13 pm    

Exactly, we tried, but we didn't get it. We needed more troops if we were to pull this off, and I suppose after a few more times he wouldn't have much choice, but there wasn't that long of a period when we tried. As for rushing into war, let me clarify: most presidents only resort to full on war as a last resort, and it seems to me that Bush, although with good intentions, went to war rather quickly.


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Theresa
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PostThu Sep 23, 2004 3:09 pm    

Tsss, I'm watching President Bush on TV right now. He's here in Bangor today. Kerry needs writers to come up with crap like this, and Bush just naturally cracks one liners, Glad we have a President who doesn't need a script,
*He's making cracks about the people standing next to him, people from Maine, so it wasn't pre-written...


(And yeah, I KNOW he has speech writers, everyone in a public position like that does)



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Ronevick
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PostThu Sep 23, 2004 3:20 pm    

How do you know Kerry's jokes aren't pre-written?

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Theresa
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PostThu Sep 23, 2004 3:27 pm    

Ronevick wrote:
How do you know Kerry's jokes aren't pre-written?



Tsss, you silly New Jersey resident, I'll assume you typed in the wrong name, because I was saying that Kerry's clearly were,
I know Bush's, right now, aren't, because he is talking about the people standing right beside him, most people he'd never met before today. Talked about one guys hair,



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Puck
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PostThu Sep 23, 2004 5:45 pm    

Theresa wrote:
Tsss, I'm watching President Bush on TV right now. He's here in Bangor today. Kerry needs writers to come up with crap like this, and Bush just naturally cracks one liners, Glad we have a President who doesn't need a script,
*He's making cracks about the people standing next to him, people from Maine, so it wasn't pre-written...


(And yeah, I KNOW he has speech writers, everyone in a public position like that does)


He is there and you are only watching him on TV?


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borgslayer
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PostThu Sep 23, 2004 7:54 pm    

Ronevick wrote:
Come on people, Kerry helped Clinton to pull the country out of a terrible economy when Clinton was president. We were gradually getting better with our money then Bush came in and blew the whole thing up in smoke. Now medical care costs are up, the economy is generally suffering, and we have the largest national deficit in modern history. Bush never stuck to his plan in Iraq, and now more than 1000 young American lives have been lossed. Bush fired all of the people actually doing their jobs correctly, and even his staff say he's been lying to the American public. What Kerry's doing is what Clinton's did, getting in touch with the American public and connecting with them on a level they understand. Just because he's running for president doesn't mean he can't crack a few jokes, and as far as i'm concerned, Bush deserves it.


Niceway to say it


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Ronevick
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PostFri Sep 24, 2004 6:11 pm    

Theresa wrote:
Ronevick wrote:
How do you know Kerry's jokes aren't pre-written?



Tsss, you silly New Jersey resident, I'll assume you typed in the wrong name, because I was saying that Kerry's clearly were,
I know Bush's, right now, aren't, because he is talking about the people standing right beside him, most people he'd never met before today. Talked about one guys hair,


Silly New Jersey resident?


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