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Theresa
Lux Mihi Deus
Joined: 17 Jun 2001
Posts: 27256
Location: United States of America
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 Tue Aug 10, 2004 11:52 am A Wonderful Speech.... |
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....that we will never, but would be awesome to, hear.
| Quote: | WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR GEORGE W. BUSH
GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?
My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of Iraq regime has been
completed. Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this
war, our mission in Iraq is complete. This morning I gave the order for
a
complete removal of all American forces from Iraq. This action will be
complete within 30 days. It is now to begin the reckoning. Before me, I
have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have
stood
by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short. The United
Kingdom, Spain, Bulgaria, Australia, and Poland are some of the
countries
listed there. The other list contains everyone not on the first list.
Most
of the worlds nations are on that list. My press secretary will be
distributing copies of both lists later this evening.
Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those
nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved
during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the
Iraqi
war. The American people are no longer going to pour money into third
world
Hell-holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.
Need
help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France. In the
future,
together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward
solving
the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word
to
terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and
eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth. Thirsting
for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France, or maybe China. To Israel
and
the Palestinian Authority. Yo, boys. Work out a peace deal now. Just
note
that Camp David is closed. Maybe all of you can go to Russia for
negotiations. They have some great palaces there. Big tables, too. I am
ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France,
Germany, and Russia. Thanks for all your help, comrades.
We are retiring from NATO as well. . chance, mes amis. I have instructed
the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic
vehicles
located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites
where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't
care
about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of
thousands
of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious
Benzes, Beamers, and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop
shops
in the world. I love New York.
A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we are
likely
to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not
pissing us off for a change. Mexico is also on List 2. President Fox and
his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will
have a couple extra tank and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess
where
I am going to put em? Yep, border security. So start doing something
with
your oil. Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA
treaty
--- starting now. We are tired of the one-way highway.
It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens.
Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them be saying, "darn
tootin." Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life
around
the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone
on
the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America. It is time to
eliminate homelessness in America. It is time to eliminate World Cup
Soccer
from America.
To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thanks guys. We owe you and
we
won't forget.
To the nations on List 2, a final thought. Drop dead.
God bless America. Thank you and good night. |
-------signature-------
Some of us fall by the wayside
And some of us soar to the stars
And some of us sail through our troubles
And some have to live with our scars
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Captain Dappet
Forum Revolutionist
Joined: 06 Feb 2002
Posts: 16756
Location: On my supersonic rocket ship.
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 11:58 am |
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I hope you're joking.
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Thomas
Pool Princess
Joined: 08 Jul 2001
Posts: 19730
Location: Manchester
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 12:03 pm |
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It's funny because it's true, 
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Gloss rhymes with hair!
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Starbuck
faster...
Joined: 19 Feb 2003
Posts: 8715
Location: between chaos and melody
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 12:10 pm |
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/\ Yeah, I have to agree with you there, Tommy boy.
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Theresa
Lux Mihi Deus
Joined: 17 Jun 2001
Posts: 27256
Location: United States of America
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 12:41 pm |
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| Captain Dappet wrote: | | I hope you're joking. |
Why? It'd be great. We wouldn't have to bother with anyone anymore, so no more bitching, 
-------signature-------
Some of us fall by the wayside
And some of us soar to the stars
And some of us sail through our troubles
And some have to live with our scars
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Seven of Nine
Sammie's Mammy
Joined: 16 Jun 2001
Posts: 7871
Location: North East England
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 12:57 pm |
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Cool It ain't gonna happen baby
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Republican_Man
STV's Premier Conservative
Joined: 26 Mar 2004
Posts: 14823
Location: Classified
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 1:00 pm |
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| Theresa wrote: | | Captain Dappet wrote: | | I hope you're joking. |
Why? It'd be great. We wouldn't have to bother with anyone anymore, so no more *beep*, |
Agreed. I think he should make the speech--I would think that some Liberals would like it, anyways--maybe even most. At least most of the speech, anyway.
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"Rights are only as good as the willingness of some to exercise responsibility for those rights- Fmr. Colorado Senate Pres. John Andrews
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Theresa
Lux Mihi Deus
Joined: 17 Jun 2001
Posts: 27256
Location: United States of America
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 1:04 pm |
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Tsssss, I am sending it to [email protected],
-------signature-------
Some of us fall by the wayside
And some of us soar to the stars
And some of us sail through our troubles
And some have to live with our scars
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Republican_Man
STV's Premier Conservative
Joined: 26 Mar 2004
Posts: 14823
Location: Classified
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 1:07 pm |
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Funny!
Oh, and to all you Liberals at STV: I meant NO OFFENSE by my above comment.
-------signature-------
"Rights are only as good as the willingness of some to exercise responsibility for those rights- Fmr. Colorado Senate Pres. John Andrews
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Starbuck
faster...
Joined: 19 Feb 2003
Posts: 8715
Location: between chaos and melody
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 3:19 pm |
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That speach could get him re-elected.
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Captain Dappet
Forum Revolutionist
Joined: 06 Feb 2002
Posts: 16756
Location: On my supersonic rocket ship.
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 3:26 pm |
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Good thing he wont do it, then 
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Starbuck
faster...
Joined: 19 Feb 2003
Posts: 8715
Location: between chaos and melody
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 4:13 pm |
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I happen to want him re-elected
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Founder
Dominion Leader
Joined: 21 Jun 2004
Posts: 12755
Location: Gamma Quadrant
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 4:26 pm |
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First of all thats hilarious.
| Quote: | It is time to eliminate World Cup
Soccer
from America. |
Second, as funny and great and amazing it would be for him to make that speech. He would definitly forfeit the Presidency if he did. So many more people would hate him. The only peopl that would stanf up and cheer are red necks who hate helping foreigners. Funny speech but unless we want Kerry to be President.....then Bush should NOT do it.
Although I did picture it with his voice and mannerisms and everything. Its funny as all hell. Especially the people's faces watching it. Can you imagine if he did at a press conference? EVERY reporter there would have questions.
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Republican_Man
STV's Premier Conservative
Joined: 26 Mar 2004
Posts: 14823
Location: Classified
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 5:27 pm |
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| Founder wrote: | First of all thats hilarious.
| Quote: | It is time to eliminate World Cup
Soccer
from America. |
Second, as funny and great and amazing it would be for him to make that speech. He would definitly forfeit the Presidency if he did. So many more people would hate him. The only peopl that would stanf up and cheer are red necks who hate helping foreigners. Funny speech but unless we want Kerry to be President.....then Bush should NOT do it.
Although I did picture it with his voice and mannerisms and everything. Its funny as all hell. Especially the people's faces watching it. Can you imagine if he did at a press conference? EVERY reporter there would have questions. |
I agree with EVERYTHING you said there. However, the Democrats SHOULD like it (as in he's saying what they truly want)--at least, the Liberals SHOULD.
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"Rights are only as good as the willingness of some to exercise responsibility for those rights- Fmr. Colorado Senate Pres. John Andrews
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Angeldust
The Mob Queen
Joined: 28 Jul 2004
Posts: 6498
Location: In your most wonderful, screwed up dreams. :P
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| Tue Aug 10, 2004 6:06 pm |
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There are no words to describe how much I would love to hear that the U.S. is pulling out of Iraq. Unfortunately, for the sake of regional stability and economic security, it is out of the question.
-------signature-------
"You want to dance with the angels? Then embroider me with gold; and I will fly with the angels...and you can dance with me."
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Seven of Nine
Sammie's Mammy
Joined: 16 Jun 2001
Posts: 7871
Location: North East England
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| Wed Aug 11, 2004 7:00 am |
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You can't get rid of Footie! It's not allowed!
The rest is fine though
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Kyre
Commodore
Joined: 15 Mar 2002
Posts: 1263
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| Wed Aug 11, 2004 11:29 am |
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The funny thing is, if America actually put any effort into football they'd probably be really good at it.
1. Brazil
2. France
3. Spain
4. Argentina
5. Czech Republic
6. Netherlands
7. England
8. Mexico
9. Italy
10. Turkey & USA
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Republican_Man
STV's Premier Conservative
Joined: 26 Mar 2004
Posts: 14823
Location: Classified
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| Wed Aug 11, 2004 12:51 pm |
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| Kyre wrote: | The funny thing is, if America actually put any effort into football they'd probably be really good at it.
1. Brazil
2. France
3. Spain
4. Argentina
5. Czech Republic
6. Netherlands
7. England
8. Mexico
9. Italy
10. Turkey & USA |
And that is relivent...HOW?
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"Rights are only as good as the willingness of some to exercise responsibility for those rights- Fmr. Colorado Senate Pres. John Andrews
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Kyre
Commodore
Joined: 15 Mar 2002
Posts: 1263
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| Wed Aug 11, 2004 1:40 pm |
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So you didn't read the article then, no?
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Republican_Man
STV's Premier Conservative
Joined: 26 Mar 2004
Posts: 14823
Location: Classified
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| Wed Aug 11, 2004 1:47 pm |
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When you say football, do you mean Soccer, then?
-------signature-------
"Rights are only as good as the willingness of some to exercise responsibility for those rights- Fmr. Colorado Senate Pres. John Andrews
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Seven of Nine
Sammie's Mammy
Joined: 16 Jun 2001
Posts: 7871
Location: North East England
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| Wed Aug 11, 2004 2:00 pm |
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No, he means Football, cos that's what it's called in our country (notice I referred to it as footie )
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Republican_Man
STV's Premier Conservative
Joined: 26 Mar 2004
Posts: 14823
Location: Classified
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| Wed Aug 11, 2004 2:03 pm |
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| Seven of Nine wrote: | | No, he means Football, cos that's what it's called in our country (notice I referred to it as footie ) |
But in American terms he means Soccer...Okay, yes, I did read that part, Kyre, but I got confused with the "Football"
-------signature-------
"Rights are only as good as the willingness of some to exercise responsibility for those rights- Fmr. Colorado Senate Pres. John Andrews
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Seven of Nine
Sammie's Mammy
Joined: 16 Jun 2001
Posts: 7871
Location: North East England
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| Wed Aug 11, 2004 2:05 pm |
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Ours came first- we get the name
Yours is called American Football, cos its your version of rugby
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Kyre
Commodore
Joined: 15 Mar 2002
Posts: 1263
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| Wed Aug 11, 2004 3:02 pm |
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| Republican_Man wrote: | | Seven of Nine wrote: | | No, he means Football, cos that's what it's called in our country (notice I referred to it as footie ) |
But in American terms he means Soccer...Okay, yes, I did read that part, Kyre, but I got confused with the "Football" |
No worries.
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Theresa
Lux Mihi Deus
Joined: 17 Jun 2001
Posts: 27256
Location: United States of America
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| Wed Aug 11, 2004 10:56 pm |
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| Seven of Nine wrote: | Ours came first- we get the name
Yours is called American Football, cos its your version of rugby |
My word, just give the boy a straight answer next time. And American football is actually very dissimilar from rugby, really.
Anyway, back on topic.
-------signature-------
Some of us fall by the wayside
And some of us soar to the stars
And some of us sail through our troubles
And some have to live with our scars
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