Next Gen crew at high school!

[ussshorty]

this isnt my story but i was reading it and i just found it so funny,ive got permission of the writer.so for those of you who wondered what they were like in high school.



[Q sits in the middle of nowhere.]

Q: Hell, I'm bored. There's nothing to do in the universe these days...

[A light bulb appears above Q's head.]

Q: That's it! I'll bother somebody. But whom shall I bother? Hmm...

[Q mumbles incoherently]

Q: Can't bother Janeway, she's in the mental hospital because of me...Picard? I guess he'll do...

[Another light bulb appears over Q's head.]

Q: I'll put them in a high school (in the 21st Century) and subject them to all the typical stereotypes!

[Q2 pops in.]

Q2: Hey dad, what ya doin'?

Q: Having fun.

[Q points to some words hanging in midair. They read:]

~Presenting your favorite command team in a high school drama!~

With Picard as...the guy that everyone looks to!

With Riker as...the extremely hot macho football jock-strap wearing guy with a girlfriend!

With LaForge as...the token black kid (that cares!)

With Yar as...the *beep*!

With Worf as...the silent guy that no one understands!

With Dr. Crusher as...the pretty (but unpopular) drama club girl with friends!

With Troi as...the girl known for excessive PDA with her football playing boyfriend!

With Data as...the guy everyone hangs with!

With Guinan as...the druggie!

And Wesley Crusher as...the principal!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Q2 stands in disbelief.]

Q2: Dad, there once was a time when I thought you were cool. Now you're scaring me.

Q: But it's-

Q2: Creepy.

Q2: I mean, if they all know and like each other it's not realistic.

Q: Well, I hadn't thought of that...

Q2: See, this was a bad idea. Why don't we just go home and-

Q: NO!

[Q slaps his son and prepares the high school environment.]

Q2: Ouch, that REALLY hurt!

[Q2 leaves.]

Q: Now my greatest creation will unfold!

[Q makes a bag of popcorn, a soda, and various other refreshments appear before him.]

Q: Let the games begin.

Chapter One: Right before homeroom on Monday

[Everyone can see the school's most talked about couple, Will and Deanna. Will has Deanna smashed against a locker as he sticks his tongue down her throat. People just walk past them as they do their morning ritual. Beverly approaches the couple. It's obvious that she has experience in prying them apart.]

Beverly: Hey Dea!

[By some miracle of God, Deanna separates herself from Will. The two remain in each other's arms.]

Deanna: Hi Bev! You memorize that monologue yet?

Beverly: I love monologues but I hate Shakespeare...so yes.

Deanna: I studied the monologue with Will and Jean-Luc. Jean-Luc is really good at Shakespeare.

[Beverly darts her eyes.]

Beverly: Yeah, I know.

[Before they can discuss more, Geordi and Tasha come up to talk to them.]

Tasha: You two should get a room.

Deanna: Well, you're the *beep*.

Tasha: Yeah, but I don't play tonsil-hockey with my men in the halls.

[Deanna frowns. Will tightens his grip on her waist.]

Geordi: Hey y'all don't be hatin'.

[Beverly mumbles something.]

Deanna: That's a good idea Geordi; Tasha, I'm sorry.

[Everything suddenly freezes.]

Q: What is this? I want catfights!

[Q2 pops in with ice on his face.]

Q2: I TOLD you, they know each other. They won't be very entertaining.

Q: Did I ASK for your opinion?

Q2: Uh...no.

Q: Then what are you doing?

[Q2 disappears in shame.]

chapter 1 that was,chapter 2 soon

[Voy_Girl]

Just for the sake of it, maybe you could tell us the author's nick or something?

[ussshorty]

yeah sure sorry totally slipped my mind.
right i got it from http://www.fanfiction.net and the author is janewaycrusher or crusherjaneway and feel free to e-mail her with the credit at [email protected] or just go to that website and go to tv shows click on the next generation nd it should be there somewhere and just do review


so is the first chapter good i found it pretty good.

[Voy_Girl]

Okay,

[crusherjaneway]

I am crusherjaneway and I wrote the story. I gave full permission and you can email me at the address ussshorty gave. I have other fic; if you want you can read it. That's all.

[Voy_Girl]

Okay, it's a nice idea. So far I've only seen similar fics about Voyager.

[Marina Sirtis]

Nice story

[Melodramatic]

I love that story.
Speacially the part where Wil's grip tightened around Deanna's waist..LOL ( jk)

I cant wait for chapter 2.

[ussshorty]

ill post the second chapter as soon s possible ive just got to get the site to reload properly,then ill post the second chapter.

[ussshorty]

CHAPTER 2

[Q paces in midair above homeroom 108.]

Q: What can I do to make this more entertaining?

[Q muses for a few moments, then a light bulb (yet again) lights up over his head.]

Q: Voila! What makes for good teen (even though they aren't between the ages of 13 and 19) drama? A huge test!

[Q pauses for another moment.]

Q: A final! This is going to be great!

[Q prepares the final exam in each class.]

Q: Now we begin again...

[All of our favorite characters sit in homeroom. All of them...Jean-Luc, Will, Geordi...you get it they're all there.]

Data: Geordi, make me a "paper airplane."

Geordi: Why?

Data: I have to watch you do it to learn it. You know, "monkey see, monkey do."

Geordi: Stop using common metaphors. It's annoying.

[Geordi makes a paper airplane under the watchful eye of Data.]

Geordi: You throw it.

Data: Okay.

[Data throws the airplane. It hits Tasha squarely in the back of the head.]

Tasha: Hey!

Data: Sorry.

Will: Jean-Luc, throw one. It's amusing. Twenty bucks says I can hit Beverly...

Jean-Luc: Fine.

[Jean-Luc folds a paper airplane and throws it. The airplane hits the person walking into the door.]

Wesley: Who threw the airplane?

[Silence.]

Wesley: If the guilty student doesn't come forward soon, I'll make the entire class fail their finals.

[More silence.]

Random student: What are you doing here, Mr. Crusher?

Wesley: Your teacher is ill. Budget problems prevented the use of a substitute today.

Guinan (whispers): Beverly, are you and the principal related?

Beverly: NO.

Wesley: Miss Crusher, am I to assume that you threw the paper airplane?

[Q2 appears next to Q; everything freezes.]

Q2: Wouldn't she be "Miss Howard?"

Q: Hmmm...good point. I don't feel like changing it though. Go home.

[Q2 just leaves. Everything else resumes its proper course.]

Beverly: No sir.

Wesley: Well, talking during my lecture is also insubordination of the same kind. I, however, am feeling particularly generous today. Don't do it again.

Beverly: Okay.

Wesley: Anyway-

[The Pledge of Allegiance cuts Wesley off. Then announcements last until the bell. Bell rings, and the class vacates the room.]

[The entire gang sits at the same table (not in homeroom, dumbass) at lunch. Deanna and Will are feeding each other, while Beverly reads a play. Tasha is reading a book and Guinan is trying to pry Worf's childhood out of him. Geordi and Data are discussing Geordi's crush, Leah Parker. Jean- Luc is actually eating.]

Geordi: Data, I just can't go up to her and introduce myself. She'll think I'm an idiot.

Beverly (under her breath): That's for sure.

Geordi: What Bev?

Beverly: Nothing, just thinking aloud.

Jean-Luc: Which play are you reading?

Beverly: Hamlet by Shakespeare. (Fanfiction.net won't accept my underline. I do respect the work however. So pretend it's underlined.)

Jean-Luc: I know.

[Tasha, who has been half-listening to the conversation, buts in.]

Tasha: If you knew what she was reading, why did you ask?

Geordi: Damn, you're blonde.

Tasha: I resent that; it's stereotyping.

Geordi: People stereotype me all the time, y'all, just because I'm black.

Data: We do not.

[Sensing the uncomfortable situation brewing, Deanna speaks up.]

Deanna: Everyone's worried about finals.

Geordi: Why shouldn't we be?

Tasha: Yeah, finals are the hardest tests of the year.

Deanna: Maybe we should all study tonight.

Will: That's a good idea, but I'm not disciplined enough to study.

[Will demonstrates this point by initiating a mating ritual with Deanna. She shrugs him off.]

Deanna: We know that.

Guinan: I can make sure we all stay awake tonight...I've got enough to share. And one dose is only ten dollars, just for you guys.

Jean-Luc: Uh, no thanks.

Worf: The use of drugs to facilitate study is dishonorable.

Guinan: You won't be preaching from that bible later.

Deanna: Why don't we all gather at my house tonight and study together? We're in all the same classes, so why not?

Will: That's a great idea. (To Deanna): I won't bring condoms.

Deanna: WILL! That's not what's going to happen tonight.

Will: Sure.

Deanna: We are all going to STUDY. Nothing more. Be at my house at seven.

[The group provides a chorus of affirmatives.]

Guinan: Worf, why are you so quiet?

Worf: Beverly is quiet, yet you do not inquire as to why she is.

Guinan: That's not what I mean. We all know Bev is just asocial.

Beverly: Am not.

Guinan: Whatever. Seriously Worf, why?

Worf: My upbringing taught me to be respectful of all those speaking.

Guinan: Right.

[Bell rings. Everyone splits up to travel to his or her respective classes.]

[Later, at the Troi residence, everyone is sitting with his or her books on Deanna's coffee table. No one seems to be interested in studying, however. They want excitement.]

Tasha: This is boring.

Geordi: Hate to say it but she's right.

Guinan: Since when do you talk like you're educated?

Geordi: I decided to begin changing my image, that's since when.

Guinan: Oh. Deanna, do you have something to drink?

Deanna: Sure, it's in the fridge.

[Guinan gets up and walks into the kitchen.]

Guinan: Anyone want anything?

[Everyone yells out what they want. Oddly, each person has a thirst that needs quenching. A few minutes later, Guinan returns with glasses of white liquid.]

Beverly: That's not what I wanted.

Guinan: Yes it is; you just haven't realized it yet.

[She dispenses the glasses. Everyone takes tentative sips.]

Deanna: This is wine!

Guinan: So?

Deanna: My mother will never let me live if she finds out I've been drinking!

Jean-Luc: Who cares about your mother?

[Deanna gasps.]

Deanna: How dare you?

[Jean-Luc smiles. Everyone still sips their drinks, even though they know the nature of the substance.]

Will: I have to defend my lady.

[Will just sits and drinks more wine.]

Guinan: More?

[Everyone nods. She brings back some tequila.]

Guinan: Sorry, we're out of wine.

[Everyone still sips. Studies are forgotten.]

Worf: I was a lonely child. I didn't think anyone loved me. I wanted to go back to that planet with the rest of the Klingons.

[Beverly moves to sit next to Jean-Luc.]

Beverly: Really Worf?

Worf: Really.

Tasha: This is what I call a party. More alcohol, serving wench.

Guinan: Coming right up.

[Will takes a huge gulp of tequila and stands up and stumbles over to Jean- Luc, who has his arm around Beverly.]

Will: Upon further consideration, I've decided to beat you up. I've never liked you.

Jean-Luc: Never?

Will: Well, I liked you until you insulted Deanna.

[Will throws a punch in midair and completely misses Jean-Luc, who is still sitting. Will walks back to his spot next to Deanna. Jean-Luc picks up his math book.]

Jean-Luc: Prepare to die, bitch.

[Jean-Luc aims at Will's head and tosses his book. Jean-Luc's aim is true and Will hits the ground. Deanna kneels next to him and plays nurse. Jean- Luc leans over and gives Beverly a long victory kiss.]

Tasha: Data, let's go into a more private room...

[Data and Tasha leave.]

Geordi: Can I come with you?

Guinan: They're going to have sex loser. That means that Data doesn't need you.

Worf: I feel like singing "A British Tar."

[Upon hearing the word "British," Jean-Luc breaks his kiss with Beverly and stands with Worf to sing.]

Jean-Luc and Worf: A British tar is a...

[Both fall to the ground laughing. Everything freezes again.]

Q: Now this is what I'm talking about.

[Time resumes.]

Beverly: Jean-Luc, let's get back to what we were doing...

[No one has noticed that Deanna and Will are making out on the floor. Just as Beverly and Jean-Luc get comfortable, Worf passes out, and Guinan refills her 20th drink, Luwaxana Troi enters via the front door.]

Troi: What in the fifth house is going on here?

[She kicks Deanna and Will, throws wine onto Jean-Luc and Beverly to break them up, acknowledges that Worf is out cold, and takes the bottle from Guinan's hand.]

Troi: All right, get out; get out all of you!

[Silence. Muffled noises come from the bedroom.]

Troi: Who in the hell is in my bedroom?

[She goes back and opens the door. A few screams are heard. Soon Data and Tasha leave the room, followed by Luwaxana.]

Troi: All of you leave my house immediately. No wait, I'm calling your parents.

[Everyone sits down and waits. Soon angry parents come and pick up their soon-to-be-dead kids.]

[Meanwhile, Q sits in complete stitches.]

Q: I can't wait for the verbal reprimands!

[Josi Rockholt]

Good chapters.I can't wait for the third chapter.

[ussshorty]

one third chapter coming right up

s**t the fanfic site is experiancing overlaod and i have to wait but i will keep trying

[Melodramatic]

Chapter 2 kicks a$$.
OMG, it was so funny in a way.

Deanna and Riker at it like bunnies again..hmm, somethings NEVER change......

Beverly and Picard????
Nah, its me and Picard

[ussshorty]

The honor of the names goes to Amanda. If you don't like them, then tell her about it. If you can't guess, some of this chapter takes place on AOL Instant Messenger.

Bev-redvixen5

Jean-Luc-dixonhill1701

Geordi-dashiznit

Worf-honorbound

Deanna-chocolatelvr

Will-number1

Data-data100101

Guinan-whoopicushion

Tasha-theLionessofAvalon

Wes-stickindamud

*This story is going to be written in true AIM fashion: in other words, no grammar, no spelling correctly, and other typos. So don't flame me in your review. You WILL review, right? I thought so.

[Enter everyone on the Internet, save Wesley.]

whoopicushion: so hows every1

theLionessofAvalon: still grounded thanx to u

whoopicushion: its only ben a day

theLionessofAvalon: so im still mad

number1: at least u can complain

number1: my dad didn care

chocolatelvr: its okay baby

dixonhill1701: robert isnt gonna let this go ever

redvixen5: y

dixonhill1701: cuz i messd up

redvixen5: o

honorbound: i am grounded for six months

dashiznit: ur rents really were that mad?

honorbound: no, i punished myself

dashiznit: oic

data100101: My father made me learn a lesson by working as punishment. So I suppose I was grounded.

redvixen5: omg data why do u hav to b so complicated

dixonhill1701: u get that part bev?

redvixen5: no or i wouldn't b here

whoopicushion: g2g

chocolatelvr: was not sposed to b on here mom just found me bye

[chocolatelvr and whoopicushion sign off.]

number1: wat u talking bout w/parts?

redvixen5: u no my part in de play

dixonhill1701: how come im the only 1 who nos bout Beverly in a play

theLionessofAvalon: cuz no 1 else cares

honorbound: im getting off

dashiznit: mee to

[honorbound and dashiznit well, get off.]

redvixen5: ishould b going 2

dixonhill1701: yep me also

[They leave.]

data100101: Perhaps we should all consider calling it "a night."

[With that, all sign off.]

[The next day in school at lunch, all sit and discuss the usual high school things. In other words, it's sex, sex, and more sex here. Or on the rare occasion, other gossip.]

Beverly: Did you hear that Lia Mitchell and Shane Snyder slept together?

Deanna: Bev, that's old news.

[Will, Jean-Luc, Worf, Tasha, and Geordi enter from the lunch line.]

Will: Hate to say this, but this food is pure crap.

Geordi: Ain't no way around it, y'all.

Jean-Luc: Well, at least it's food.

Tasha: Are you sure of that?

Worf: One should never pass up the chance to eat.

[Scene stops. Q appears with one of those lame posters from the cafeteria.]

Q: Advice to live by.

[Q2 enters.]

Q2: This entire idea was lame. Still is.

Q: Go away.

Q2: You!

[They both exunt; scene begins again.] ( exunt-plural form of 'exit;' used for group exits.)

Tasha: But who cares about food? What's happened today?

Data: I do believe that Shane and Lia "slept together." I do not fully understand the meaning of this phrase.

Beverly: Why don't you ask our gossip queen?

Deanna: I'm blushing. No, really, that happened a long time ago. The newest thing is that Guinan got busted. Is it true?

[All turn and look at Guinan.]

Guinan: No.

Deanna: Okay...then back to Shane and Lia.

Will (between bites): Who cares?

Beverly and Tasha: We do.

Deanna: Well, I just don't see how he could SLEEP with her.

Beverly: You don't know how that works? And you and Will have done it too.

[Mild laughter at table.]

Deanna: That's not what I mean. She's bi. Not that I'm prejudiced, but it just is odd. She's not that pretty too. Plus she's a *beep*.

Data: You possess some of those qualities in abundance.

Deanna: Shut up. He has to be tested for all kinds of STD's now.

Jean-Luc: Interesting.

Geordi: Me and the homeboys...I mean we're all still going to Hogan's on the last day of school right?

Beverly: Um hmm...

Deanna: Back to Lia and Shane.

Worf: Oh Lord.

Deanna: I don't know how she could, uh...excite him. That's all I have to say.

Will: Personally, I think Lia is kind of hot.

Geordi: Me too.

Will: You guys know, when a hot girl comes around and suddenly you can't walk-

[All of the guys nod.]

Tasha: This is disgusting.

Beverly: I agree get me out of here.

Deanna: God, what did I start? Wait. Will, how DARE you be looking at other women!

Guinan: I'm interested. Keep going.

Geordi: We all know that Jean-Luc can't move when he sees-

[Jean-Luc at this moment kicks Geordi under the table.]

Geordi (in pain): Nevermind.

Data: Our open discussion about the male sex drive is making the females in attendance feel uncomfortable.

Will: Except for Guinan.

Worf: Feelings should be kept hidden.

[Bell rings. Everyone heads off to class. Post-party, a few things have happened: Jean-Luc and Beverly walk together and Worf is a lot quieter.]

the names have chnged but theres a list t the top of who they are and their new nicknames.

[ussshorty]

ive got a traet because i took so long posting chapter 3 ive decided to post chapter 4 swell to give you guys nice long read.

[We see Q trying to catch a frog.]

Q: Stop! I have to dissect you!

[The frog stops and morphs into Q2.]

Q: That reminded me of those horrible books. You know, Anamorphs? (That seems like something Q would say. Besides, I didn't really enjoy the books. Sorry. Remember-no underlines on fanfic.net, at least I can't put them in.)

Q2: The continuum thinks you're crazy. They tried to stop you, but Mom started to make a big deal of how you're old and eccentric and can't do a thing-

Q: Normally, I'd kill you for calling me old, but not today. I'm watching my lab rats.

Q2: I'll be back to bother you later. Personally, this bores me.

Q: Me aburre, me aburre. Can't you think of anyone other than yourself?

Q2: I know what you said...remember I'm all-powerful too.

Q: But not all-knowing. Now leave.

[Q2 leaves. Q2 really seems like a wimp now, doesn't he?]

[We see our faithful friends in biology class. This is the period before lunch, and the only class that they all have together. They take the same classes, but not during the same periods...except for this one. Now Esperance! (Whoa too much Shakespeare)]

Teacher: You will come up and get your frogs one group at a time. The person you elected to cut will make the incision below the jaw and down toward the cloaca.

[Before she can continue, the announcement bell goes off. The principal, Wesley, is heard.]

Wesley: Students, do not, I REPEAT, do NOT show public displays of affection in this building. This includes kissing, hugging, etc. Teachers, if you see a public display of affection WRITE THE INVOLVED STUDENTS UP. Thank you.

[Intercom cuts off. Students are laughing; Deanna and Will both look devastated.]

Geordi: Ouch. Looks like they won't have any fun at school for a while.

Tasha: Poor Will. This is all he hopes for in the morning. And Deanna, she won't get to feel the locker door for some time.

Guinan: I guess Will won't get to have some cherry lip gloss either. That was his daily requirement for fruit, too.

Geordi: Denied!

Beverly: Guys, pay attention.

[Teacher looks at table and glares.]

Teacher: Group 4! GROUP 4!!

[Jean-Luc and Worf go up and get the frog.]

Will: Data, I nominate you for cutting.

Data: I agree. I am the most precise one present.

[Data cuts in. Surprisingly, there is no smell. The group can see all of the organs inside of the frog's body.]

Will: It's disgusting.

Beverly: No it's not; it's nature.

Jean-Luc: We can see that, Beverly.

Beverly: Jean-Luc!

[All sit, silenced. A few moments go by before Will makes a whip-cracking sound.]

Will: You're whipped.

[All agree, save Bev and Jean-Luc.]

Geordi: I want to hold the frog.

[Geordi picks the frog up and moves it through the air. He makes the frog dance.]

Tasha: Geordi, put the frog down.

[Geordi is giggling like a madman now.]

Geordi: No, I refuse.

[Will grabs the frog from Geordi and gives it to Data. He grabs the pins to pull the skin away from the organs, and hold the frog down. He tries to put the pins in and accidentally jabs the pin through the frog's arm.]

Data: I do believe I have made a mistake...

Geordi: Uh, oops...

[Guinan grabs the other pin and puts it through one of the frog's nostrils. The pin comes out of the nostrils inside the frog's mouth.]

Guinan: Cool.

[Will tries to pull on the tongue to see how long it is. He pulls it out and snap; it's all out.]

Will: Uh, guys...I think I pulled his tongue out.

[Beverly has just finished studying the inside of the frog.]

Beverly: Will, it's a girl.

Will: Oh.

Jean-Luc: Perhaps we should rectify the situation by WORKING.

Geordi: What would you do to this frog if it were Beverly?

Jean-Luc (shifts eyes): Goof off all you want.

Tasha: That's right, Jean-Luc.

[Just then Wesley walks in to observe the class.]

Wesley: I love to watch my students. It takes me back to the days when I thought I could do better than principal.

[Wesley watches as Data expertly takes the frog and removes its itty-bitty little stomach.]

Data: I am lead to believe that there is an insect inside of this frog's stomach.

All: Neat!

[All lean in to see what is basically a very small pile of black nothing.]

Teacher: Clean up! Test on frog parts tomorrow!

[Jean-Luc cleans up the unholy mess that was their frog.]

Guinan: I don't think I'm going to be able to eat after this...

Will: Sure you will. Today's nacho day.

Guinan: Ooh.....

Worf: It is dishonorable to mutilate things that once lived.

Tasha: Get in the spirit of things. Come on, or we'll never clean up fast enough.

[They join in and disinfect the table. The bell rings and lunch awaits.]

[Voy_Girl]

Good...

[Melodramatic]

LOL!
Very good
Keeps on getting better and better.

Its inspired me to write my own.....but its not even close to being done.

[ussshorty]

Ok chapter 5 now
It's during lunch and Beverly is in the restroom, well, using it. She's almost finished as a janitor approaches her stall.]

[Janitor opens stall.]

Beverly: What the hell?

Janitor: I need that toilet paper miss.

Beverly: Why?

Janitor: Budget cuts.

Beverly: But I'm not done.

Janitor: I noticed. Here, I'll be nice and give you one square.

[Rips of a square of toilet paper and hands it to Beverly. Beverly just stares at it in her hand.]

Janitor: Have a good day!

[Janitor leaves restroom. A few minutes later, Beverly leaves also and goes to her table.]

Jean-Luc: Beverly, you look stunned. What happened in there?

Beverly: They took the toilet paper.

Will: All of it?

Beverly: Everything except one square.

Deanna: The janitor must be in a good mood.

[Tasha, Data, Geordi, and Guinan come back from being in the lunch line.]

Guinan (amazed): They didn't give me my change.

Tasha: Hey, where's my drink?

Geordi: This ain't cool. [Geordi pulls the bun off of his hamburger. All can see that the only thing on the bun is some moldy ketchup.]

Data: They refused to acknowledge my need for condiments.

Tasha: Data, you don't even have a burger.

Guinan: Well still...

Jean-Luc: They are making significant cuts in order to stabilize the budget.

[Jean-Luc, ever informed, whips out a newspaper with an article entitled "TNG-LOSING MONEY?"]

Jean-Luc: It reads: 'Once one of the "richer" school districts in the county, TNG has lost all of its money. How, though, has yet to be answered. Many residents of Paramount County are questioning if perhaps the influx of money was used to refurbish the football field, get a parking lot for the football field, or give the football staff higher pay. Irate residents claim "the administrators only care about football." School board president Rick Berman refutes the accusations, saying, "We do NOT care only about football. We NEEDED to renovate the four-year old field. We NEEDED to get an additional parking lot to compliment the other two. And finally, we NEEDED to increase Coach Braga's pay, for he has stayed loyally with us for the past three years. It was time."'

'Only time will tell if TNG can fix it's problems. Until then, inhabitants of Paramount County are going to complain much louder.'

[Our entire cast of characters sits blankly as Jean-Luc finishes.]

Deanna: That article makes it sound as if the students don't care.

[Everything stops. You know the drill, in comes Q.]

Q: A protest will liven up THIS story.

[A female enters and approaches Q.]

FQ: Q, as your wife and mental stability, please return to the Continuum.

Q: Never!

FQ: The council is worried you might do something...something dangerous.

Q: I won't. Just let me stay until the end of the school year.

FQ: I'm worried. You haven't yelled at our son in days.

Q: He hasn't come to get yelled at.

FQ: You know what? I'm through with you! I'll let the council deal with this one.

[Female Q leaves in an angry huff.]

Q: Back to the old grind.

[Q leaves and initiates the flow of time.]

Guinan: We should protest. This is ridiculous.

Will: Yeah, for the toilet paper using man's sake.

Deanna: What about the toilet paper using WOMAN?

[Will pauses.]

Will: Uh...you too.

[Deanna nods. Geordi makes whip-cracking sound.]

Jean-Luc: Stop squabbling.

Data: I am not babbling.

[Jean-Luc hits his head with his hand.]

Beverly: I'll get everyone I know to do it!

Tasha: Um, Bev, we ARE everyone you know.

Geordi: Ouch.

[Worf, who has been quiet the entire time, speaks.]

Worf: It is not honorable to "short-change" someone, or to protest. Are we sure we want to do this?

Beverly: Yes. Still...okay, we'll do it alone.

[They begin to use the rest of lunch to plan their protest.]


yes i know its short but according to crusherjaneway she was feeling to lazy to make it long.

[Melodramatic]

LOL!!!!
Really getting funny.
I cant wait for chapter 6.