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JanewaysTwin Ensign, Junior Grade
Joined: 14 Apr 2009 Posts: 35 Location: So-Cal
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Wed Dec 30, 2009 9:03 pm |
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"Of course. Computer, set in a course at minimum speed towards the docking bay�of the alien ship."
The Katana soars in to the alien ship's docking hatch to await the negotiations.
"Alright, we're in. Releasing the airlock..."
"L-barranin! Istat intenzjonijiet tiegħek!" the alien soldier says,�"Għaliex usted trespassed fit-territorju tagħna u ġiet imħarbta system ta 'distribuzzjoni ta' energy tagħna?"
"I am Admiral Jordan Delmont of the USS Endeavor. We bear you no hostility, and have come through this area simply to attempt to locate a very powerful particle signature we picked up on your planet. Please speak a little more so that we can converse more easily."
"Sors tagħna ta 'l-enerġija? Il-partiċelli Alla? Dawn kienu mibgħuta lilna bħala sinjal ta' dominence tagħna fuq l-alleati tagħna, il-Na't'kar!�Ma nistgħux sempliċement allow any race who decides they want it to own a source of such power! It is our only advantage over our enemies! And for the price we could sell it for once we can reproduce it..."�
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milan Lieutenant Commander
Joined: 18 Jan 2009 Posts: 263 Location: Romania
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Sat Jan 02, 2010 4:26 am |
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Hello, dear Tzizistzhians, am I right? Let me introduce myself, I am High and Absolute King of my species the Ferengi, the most advanced race in the Alpha Quadrant. As a token of our appreciation of the wonderful Tzimisckian race I have come in person, to offer our benevolent alliance, nay, selfless help, to our esteemed fellows in advancement. And I am so glad you have cut to the chase, for we are indeed here to negotiate about our mutual benefactor the silly little component called Omega. Now we don't usually bother actually purchasing such a dismal little component, from which we brew our favoured softdrink back in our headquarters on Ferengenar, but as a token of our good will, we are ready dispense with our needs and only look at your advantage. Since this Omega thingy is what you have so courteously offered us as negotiation-opener in what I trust will be a most fruitful and beneficial business-relationship for both our species, I am willing to make a deal for say, half... did I say half, I meant three-quarters of your stash. Now let me assure you that this Omega-deal is only a symbolic beginning of our prolific partnership, after this we can start dealing in more serious transactions, like that of cosmetics, have you ever tried Bolian Rose-perfume, for instance? Here, have a whiff, on the house. Enticing, isn't it? See, I told you you'd like it. Now Here's a free, yes, absolutely free issue of our credo the Revised Rules of Acquisition, you should study it meticulously before you come up with any offer... just so you'd be familiarized with our way of making business, before we strike a bargain. May I bring to your attention my favourite Rule, number 21: "Never place profit before friendship." Oh, you would like the Bolian perfume? Here, take the whole bottle. You see, we live by our rules, dear friend. And live well.
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JanewaysTwin Ensign, Junior Grade
Joined: 14 Apr 2009 Posts: 35 Location: So-Cal
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Sat Jan 02, 2010 9:55 am |
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"Indeed we do. *clears throat* Err, Drat, can I have a little chat with you real fast? We need the full load, and unless you have a plan... Which I assume you do, since you slightly altered Rule 21, 'Always profit from friendship.'
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milan Lieutenant Commander
Joined: 18 Jan 2009 Posts: 263 Location: Romania
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Mon Jan 04, 2010 2:19 pm |
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'Admiral' - Drat whispers appalled - 'Where is all this doubt coming from? Personally, any Ferengi would be flabbergasted if insulted that way, fortunately I know you like I do the gleaming underside of a bar of gold pressed latinum, so I know you didn't mean that. But you're right, it's best to keep the guys confused, am I right? Well if you confused me I imagine they don't know what two plus two is at the moment. But I shall indulge you, moreover, I shall even give you a copy of the "Revised Rules of Aczuisition", the key word here is "revised", well this is ancient history, but in the time of Grand Nagus Zek, the above mentioned mastermind had a temporary insanity bout and rewrote the Rules of Acquisition into a benevolent bunch of baloney if you know what I mean, totally opposite the real "Rules of Acquisition" that a normal person can live by. It talks about friendship and honour and all these crappy terms that only exist in a Klingon vocabulary. But that's exactly what we need them to believe we are like, and when they bite, we just reel them in like so many Slimeswamp salmons. And of course we will get the whole sick bunch of Omega, but why ask for something when you can make them beg you to take it, am I right? Remember rule of acquisition 52, now from the real book: "Never ask when you can take."
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