Christmas Jokes & Lines

[borgslayer]

This is a restaurant line on christmas.

Customer: Waiter! Could you serve up some Nutcracker Suite.
Waiter: Yes sir coming right up. You guys I need one Nutcracker Suite.
Manager: David I gonna need you to Deck The Halls real quick.
David: Yes sir.
Waiter: What would you like ma'am?
Lady: I would like to order some Chestnuts.
Manager: I want that Chestnuts Roasting right away.
Chef: Yes sir.
Waiter: Would like some Carols of the Bells on the side?
Lady: Yes I would.

[Cathexis]

LMAO!!!!!!!!

[Republican_Man]

Cheasy one:
Q: Why does Santa have a list of the nice AND the naugthty?
A: Because it tells him where the bad girls are.

[nadia]

That ones heaps funny

[borgslayer]

Naval Officers Christmas Line

Captain: Peter have you seen Lieutenant Claus?
Peter: No Captain, I have not.
Captain: (on mic) Attention Lieutenant Santa Claus please report for duty 0800 hours in my office.
Peter: Captain! Lieutenant Claus has Decked the Halls.
Captain: What?!
Peter: Looks like he slipped on that Nutcracker Suite Sir.
Captain: Where is he now Ensign?
Peter: He is at sickbay sir being treated for his wounds by Nurse Carol.
Captain: Why does he always do this to me when I need him.
Captain: Peter I'm going down their and to find that Nutcracker Suite before someone else gets hurt.
Peter: Aye, Sir.

[Brightstar82]

LOL this is a very very corny one but here goes.

Q: What did the snowman eat for breakfast?
A: Snowflakes