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The past and the future
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Superman
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Joined: 06 Dec 2003
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PostThu Apr 13, 2006 7:52 pm    The past and the future

A lot of people tell me that whatever unhappiness you've experienced in the past, you should just move on. I find that impossible to believe. I do NOT want sympathy and I'm not going to go into detail about my problems, but the past was such a happy place. It's not rose-tinted glasses, it really was the better place.

I just wish I could go back and relive my life, and change a few things. Hindsight is a wonderful thing, and I'd change so many decisions I made. I know it sounds silly, but just this morning, I was listening to some old songs and they just sent me back in time, to happier times. Even a decade ago, I was much happier, at work and in my personal life.

To be honest, I crave the past. It does sound silly, I know it does. If I polled ten random people on the street, and asked them what they thought about me craving the past, they'd probably laugh. The funny thing is, though, that whilst I do wish I could just go back in time to when I was happier, there was stuff from years ago that has resulted in my current unhappiness. The past seems both good and bad.

I won't go on too much, but I just hate the present. Actually, I despise the present. It's even worse when I think about a) happier times and b) errors of judgement and bad decisions made in the past. The present just sucks at the moment. That's all I can think of to say.

People say move on, and I understand they are trying to help. I don't know, I just wish there was a doctor who could give me something LEGAL which would supress memories and completely block out things from my past. To be honest, the closest thing I can get to the past is just listening to as many records and cassettes from the past. That is slightly helpful in going back a little, but I just wish I could blot out memories.

One person told me that I shouldn't wish I could blot out memories because they make me who I am. Frankly, I don't care. If I could blot out memories from the past, and just remember the happy stuff, then I'd do it. Anyway, thanks for reading. It's slightly therapeutic to just type this stuff.


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Captain Patrick
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Joined: 06 Mar 2005
Posts: 2421

PostThu Apr 13, 2006 8:04 pm    

Interesting, Very Interesting.

My view on your problem is that the decision and experinces that you made in the past define who you are physical and mentaly, ever one at some point in time wishs to be able to go back and change a mistake or a bad decision but the simple fact is that you can't you proably never will get the chance in this life time. What you need to do is take a long moment of meditation and relaxtion and go reflex on your past and see how it was better than your present that way you can try to make your present and future a better place, Learn from the past mistakes that brought you to where you are now.

Does any thing i just said make any sense to you?


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Superman
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PostThu Apr 13, 2006 8:06 pm    

It does and I appreciate it. Thank you. However, I think I've gone past a certain point, if you know what I mean. To be honest, I just wish I could go find a *beep* island to live on.

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lionhead
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Joined: 26 May 2004
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PostFri Apr 14, 2006 5:42 am    

you HAVE to move on since you can't go to the past.

Wishfull thinking doesn't help solving your problems either.

Your goal should be making the future a better place instead of Hating the fact something happened that always makes the Past better(like the death of a relative).



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Never explain comedy or satire or the ironic comment. Those who get it, get it. Those who don't, never will. -Michael Moore

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Superman
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PostSun Apr 16, 2006 4:56 pm    

Thanks for your views, Lionhead, I appreciate you taking the time to post them.

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Oliver
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Joined: 28 Feb 2004
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Location: Antwerp, Belgium

PostMon Apr 17, 2006 1:45 am    

Oh I have made many mistakes in my past, probably more than done good things. But do I regret making them? No. It's partly due to the mistakes I made in the past that made me the person who I am now. Having second thoughts about what you've done is good; it shows you've been thinking about what's good and right and that alone makes you a good person. To me anyway...

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Superman
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PostMon Apr 17, 2006 12:37 pm    

I appreciate the kind words, Oliver. Thanks. I guess I've got a lot to sort out. I just don't see no light at the end of the tunnel.

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Birdy
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Joined: 20 Sep 2004
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PostMon Apr 17, 2006 2:53 pm    

In a way, I understand what you're saying. I couldn't understand completely; I'm just not in your shoes.
It's very hard to live with your own decisions, if you see that it has gotten you somewhere you don't want to be.

I think it's hars for people to say just 'move on'. It's not quite that easy! How do you move on? What practical things do you have to do for it to move on?

I can understand you want to live in the past, but I guess it's just not possible. Every day is different, you are different everyday because of the choices you make, and what expieriences you get by living.

I don't have a simple or plain answer for you. I think I can just tell you that I understand how you feel.
I think you have to realize at some point that you have a choice in life. You have a choice to either live in the past, or to do something with the present. I think if you decide that, it's a whole different story..

Again, I can't really give you a good advice since I don't know your whole situation. I just hope you'll feel better soon Stephen, I just hate to see people suffer or be miserable!
Hugs.



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Superman
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PostMon Apr 17, 2006 4:12 pm    

Thanks, Merel. I appreciate it. What I do appreciate is when people are honest with me. I hate to be patronized by people, but on this forum, people are kind, but honest.

Thanks again, folks.


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