Discipline and smacking kids?

harrykims#1fan · **Wed Aug 31, 2005 4:30 am**

a good slappin/spankin never hurt me and i got a fair few in my youth..parents are just too soft on kids now a days (no offence to anyone here) the only thing i dont agree with is when a parent slaps their kid in public i hate seein that really i do.

but i see no problem with a kid gettin a good slappin/spanking

Quinny · **Wed Aug 31, 2005 6:11 am**

Lets consult the Bible shall we...Prov 29:15 The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a child left to himself disgraces his mother.

I am in favour of smacking a child if he does wrong. I am 17, and was smaked as a child. I believe it does provide wisdom...lol, do that again and you'll get a smack...lol...you learn pretty quickly. I think it is better to be tought a lesson by your parents who love you and care for you, than to let the world teach you a lesson. Parents should do it out of love, not anger. They should never hit there children out of anger, but they should do it becaus they love them. I know that sounds like a funny thing to say, but think about it, you get a smack for doing something wrong, it hurts for a while (but you soon get over it), but it is better to be tought the lesson by your parents (who love you) than let the world teach you the lesson (who dont care for you).

Although it might sound like your kid is dying when they get smacked, they will quickly get over it.

Leo Wyatt

Puck · The Texan Joined: 05 Jan 2004 Posts: 5596

I think in most cases, you don't need to spank kids to teach them what they did wrong or whatever. I am sure there are some exceptions, however, for the most part, I do not think it is necessary. Of course, alot of it depends on the child. Like, my parents tried spanking me, but it only made things worse because it made me more defiant. So, I can only remember being spanked once or twice in my whole life.

If I were a parent though, I would try to never spank my child, because to me, it seems like you are just teaching them that sometimes, violence is ok to use to get your point accross-and that is not a lesson I would want them to learn.

magenta · **Wed Aug 31, 2005 7:19 am**

Quinny you hit the nail on the head,when you are a kid receiving the smack[spank].You think the parent is the nastiest thing in the universe!
But when you become an adult,look back on your childhood and know that they were doing it because they love you!
Your parents want you to be a nice person,be liked,have friends and learn to work hard for the things they want.People who have bad parents,abusive,never home or around enough or let their kids do what they want.Those kids end up in jail,by doing stupid things for attention.
Or they end up alone,no friends or false friends that only use them for what they want.
We have to teach our kids that life is not just served to us on a platter,you have to get off your butts and earn your place in this world.
I think that good parenting is the most important job in the world,we are raising our future generation to take our place.
WE CANT AFFORD TO STUFF IT UP!

Quinny · **Wed Aug 31, 2005 7:30 am**

Starbuck · **Wed Aug 31, 2005 8:38 am**

I would have no problem giving my children a good swat if they got out of line. My parents did it to me, its not abuse. Abuse would be submerging your screaming child in scalding hot water to make them be quiet. Abuse would be smashing them into the floor, and into doors, and through walls or windows. A good swat on the butt is not abuse, and is PERFECTLY acceptable.

tycoon64 · **Wed Aug 31, 2005 8:55 am**

Agreed with Starbuck. As long as anger is not behind the spanking you are fine and no paddle is involved. The government does not like us spanking our kids and yet they complain that we dont control them either.... whats next?

Sam Kenobi · **Wed Aug 31, 2005 12:00 pm**

IntrepidIsMe · **Wed Aug 31, 2005 2:03 pm**

If I ever have a kid(s), I wouldn't ever use pain to manage my child. From what I've seen personally, it only causes the children to act out more and assosiate their parents with violence and pain. That isn't right.

I was never smacked or spanked as a child, and I'm better for it.

Sam Kenobi · **Wed Aug 31, 2005 3:25 pm**

Well... maybe everyone's different then. I don't associate my parents with pain or violence of any sort. And it's not like I got spanked every night. Just for deliberately doing what they told me not to. And personally, it taught me to respect my parents for the authority figures they are. So maybe I'll become a serial killer because I got spanked a few times as a kid. That'll be your proff that spanking is bad. I mean... it hasn't been a form of punishment for hundreds of years or anything. Hey, I bet that's why the world turned out so bad....

IntrepidIsMe · **Wed Aug 31, 2005 4:49 pm**

Sheesh, I wasn't speaking to you personally, or anything.

As I said, those are just things I've seen in my experience.

Theresa · **Wed Aug 31, 2005 6:51 pm**

I don't remember spankings ever really hurting. More of something I just knew I didn't want to get,

harrykims#1fan · **Thu Sep 01, 2005 4:52 am**

i used to always laugh when i got slapped, thats why they gave in and wouldnt slap me after a certain age. that and they knew that as i grew older i had this amazin ability to slap back as well.
Mom and dad always told me if someone slaps you, you slap them back

madlilnerd · **Thu Sep 01, 2005 5:26 am**

I think that spanking is much more effective than other methods like "the naughty chair". Naughty chairs and standing in the corner only works on really stupid kids, because an intelligent child would just get up out of the chair.

I got spanked as a child and I don't think I am a particularly violent invidual. I have self control.

However, I don't think that using canes in schools is right. That's just barbaric. Teachers should have tasers instead.

magenta · **Thu Sep 01, 2005 6:50 am**

Intrepid when you have kids,you will find out first hand if smacking or not to is what you will do.At 15 or 16yrs old I was saying stuff like that,the smacks were still fresh in my mind.At that age the hormones are kicking in and the I can do what I want stuff!
When you get older and see more of life you will realise life is a bitch and doesnt come free!
Your parents already know this,they are older and have seen more of life,been alive a lot longer.I have looked back on my childhood and realised that my parents were a wise pair with my future well being at heart!

[/quote]

IntrepidIsMe · **Thu Sep 01, 2005 1:20 pm**

I wasn't ever hurt as a child, meaning slapped or spanked or what have you. Its not as if I've grown up to be a bad, unjust, trouble making person. So, as far as I can see you don't need to hurt your children to make them gain your respect. I respect my parents more for not resorting to violence whenever I acted up.

Leo Wyatt · **Thu Sep 01, 2005 2:28 pm**

Spanking is not hurting a child. It is not even abuse.. Now beating is abuse... There is a difference. Spanking is not violence. Beating is...

madlilnerd · **Thu Sep 01, 2005 3:03 pm**

It is the legal guardian's decision how they want to raise their child, but personally, I think children that grow up without strong negative experiences are weak little whinging brats most of the time. Of course, there are exceptions to this rule.

IntrepidIsMe · **Thu Sep 01, 2005 4:05 pm**

Starbuck · **Thu Sep 01, 2005 4:28 pm**

While thats true, Aaron, abuse is defined as "to hurt or injure by maltreatment; ill-use". maltreatment is defined as "to treat in a rough or cruel way". Can you please tell me what is rough or cruel about spanking your child?

IntrepidIsMe · **Thu Sep 01, 2005 5:10 pm**

Last time I checked, its cruel to hurt another person.

Starbuck · **Thu Sep 01, 2005 5:11 pm**

The thing is, is that it doesn't *hurt*. Its a quick sting and then its over. Hurt is defined as lasting pain.

IntrepidIsMe · **Thu Sep 01, 2005 5:17 pm**

Leo Wyatt · **Thu Sep 01, 2005 6:18 pm**

are you raising kids IntrepidIsme? I believe you don't have kids am I right?

Most people who don't have kids of course thinks spanking is abuse when it is not. Spanking and beating are two different things. Kids want to run from a spanking to manupliate. I know, my kids try to maupilate (sorry for incorrect spelling) Cause they want to misbehave and do wrong. They think it is alright to try to do bad things. Kids these days try to control the parents. That is not how it works. Kids should not be allowed to go out of control just cause a few people say spanking is abuse when spanking is not. Unless you are raising a few kids of your own, you probably would not understand. Time out does not work like people say it does. It makes things worse. It teaches the kids to misbehave and control the parent.

Now taking a fist, or banging a kid against the wall are examples of abuse.

Spanking on the butt properly but not with anger is not abuse.

Arellia · **Thu Sep 01, 2005 6:25 pm**

All well and fine if that's how you want to do it. I'd rather teach my kids why what they did was wrong, maybe make them feel remorse over the act, not fear of the punishment. Punishment has to be there, but it doesn't have to be physical. That's how my mother taught me. If other people want to teach their kids a different way, go on ahead (short of real abuse) I couldn't bring myself to strike another being to "teach" them something.